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It's Just A Delusion

The World According To Kiki & J-Fed

Sure, it was his kid and he had the right to know what happened. But did it EVER occur to him that if she had been “burned” she would be pain, screaming or emitting some sort of verbal response when you pushed on the blisters? She was happy as a clam, a spotted clam, but a clam nonetheless.

Nah, that would be common sense and it was much easier to launch accusations. Oh stupid, stupid J-Fed. A+ for coming to the doctors; F- for accusing Kiki of burning the baby.

Needless to say, J-Fed made sure to ask the doctor if someone could have burned the baby once we got inside. And I made sure to remind J-Fed that NO ONE HAD BURNED THE BABY while the doctor made a mental note to never get married. He assured J-Fed that no one had burned the baby. J-Fed breathed a huge sigh of relief in knowing that the baby hadn’t been the victim of abuse or neglect. It was just a lil ole staph infection.

While J-Fed sat in his apartment without a care in the world that night, I itched all over and wondered if I too would be overcome by this highly contagious affliction. I washed my hands no less than 50 times in two hours. I almost cried when I accidentally made contact with the infected area. Meanwhile, J-Fed rested comfortably in knowing that Rain Man didn’t burn baby… and neither did Kiki.

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