It's Quitting Time

I have been involved in a relationship for about 10 years now. We have only been married 18 months, however. We have three children, ages 5 and under. I lost my job a year and a half ago, and we had to move in with my husband's parents. Long story short, I recently found out that my husband is cheating on me. He claims that since I caught him he has stopped but I just have this horrible feeling that he is still seeing her. How do I know for sure if he has stopped cheating? There is no one in my family that has the means to help me and my children. I do love my husband but he has a bad problem with spending money. That is why we are living in his parent's house. I know that he thinks I spend too much time with our kids, but he doesn't help out with them at all. He does make me happy when he tries. I just don't know how to get him to only want me again. Please help!

So let me get this straight. This man is cheating on you. He can’t support you and your family because of his spending habits. He thinks you spend too much time with your children, and doesn’t help out with them at all. And you’re trying to figure out how to keep him? What am I missing?

How often does he “try” to make you happy? Would he quit cheating to “try” to make you happy? Would he “try” going to counseling with you? Is he willing to “try” anything to make your marriage work? My dear it can’t be you doing all the work.

The two of you have children together, a commitment you made to each other and theoretically a long life ahead. But you’re not working on it as a couple. He’s not dedicated to you or his own children. Until he demonstrates that, I honestly can’t understand why you’d want him back.

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