Do You Hear What I Hear?

The holiday season is upon us. And do you know what that means? Well, as a divorced woman, it means spending the holidays apart from the ex. Oh wait! That was the last few years. It feels like we were arguing every holiday and usually spent them apart with our respected families. Why should this year be any different? Well, because we can do it with no guilt. Yippee!

Finally, a holiday where he won't be able to gobble up my soul!

J-Fed was already planning for Thanksgiving this summer. He had told me that he wanted the kids on Black Friday. At first, I was confused. Why didn't he want them on Thanksgiving? But then I remembered I was dealing with the biggest turkey of all and it made sense.

I thought we were all in the clear until yesterday. I reminded him that Thanksgiving is next Thursday and he reminded me that he gets them on Thanksgiving. I could have pointed out that he got the kids on Halloween. But nah. I played along.

"You had them on Halloween and you specifically told me you wanted them the Friday after Thanksigiving," I pointed out.

"No, the deal was that you could take them to the mountains for the last few days if I got them for Thanksigiving," he said.

Um, no jackass. I told you that I WOULDN'T take them to the mountains for the Thanksgiving holidays. Nowhere in that equation did I say you that meant you'd get them for Thanksgiving. I simply meant that you'd get them for the day following Thanksgiving. And I hate to remind J-Fed that as the primary custodial guardian I could take them to the friggin moon if I so pleased. However, I kept all of these sentiments to myself as I was making headway.

Apparently, somebody had been practicing selective hearing when we had this discussion. I thought about fighting for Thanksgiving. But on second thought I pondered the prospect of not having to cook, not having to do dishes, not having to do a damn thing. I thought about sitting down with the box set of Miami Vice and a 6-pack of Bud Light and a wide grin crossed my face.