Introducing Mr. Ex

I always hated those movies where the heroine chases the loser guys and gets screwed over while the hero was in front of her face the whole time. For two hours, you want to grab her by her hair and smack her for being blind and stupid. Thankfully, she eventually realizes the err of her ways before it's too late.

Ok, so truth be told. I was that girl. I first met Mr. Ex three and a half months ago when he moved in across the street from my parents. Through the neighborhood rumor mill, I learned that he was a divorced father of two. Okay, so that was an interesting coincidence. But it got better, he was also in the exact same line of work as J-Fed. In fact, years ago, J-Fed had actually applied for a job at the same place Mr. Ex worked, before starting his own business. Needless to say, I didn't know ANYBODY else that had been in the industry. I was caught off guard a bit.

Since I spend a great deal of time down at my parents' house, it goes without saying that we met not long after he moved in. We'd talk shop about his new house, work, kids and divorce. He seemed like a nice enough guy, but I never gave it much thought. We could easily talk for an hour and then go our separate ways. A week would go by until we saw each other again.

I was far too busy screwing off on online dating sites and wasting time with guys that would never amount to anything to even really notice Mr. Ex in that way. After a couple of months of our little chit chat sessions, I went out on a limb and suggested we grab a drink sometime. He showed me his; I showed him mine, digits that is. I lost his and well, God knows what he did with mine, but he sure didn't use them... at least not for a couple of weeks.

Then one random Thursday, I got the call. Somebody had given Mr. Ex a bottle of Italian champagne and he needed a partner in crime to polish it off. I hated champagne, but that was just a small detail that I didn't feel inclined to share. Instead, I simply brought over three Bud Lights of my own. Little did I Know he'd have a small aresenal of the very same brand. It was just one of many similarities I'd later find out.