The Anatomy Of A Male (How He Thinks)

My perception of how men think...

Laundry - There's no reason to wash clothes as long as there are still some in the drawers and closet.

Dishes - Similar to laundry. Why bother washing dirty ones if there are still clean ones available?

Garbage - As long as it doesn't stink who cares how full it gets?

Making the bed - Why fix it now since I'll only be messing it up again later?

Buying groceries - anything that goes in the microwave is good enough.

Cooking - Microwaves are good. Throwing 20 things into one pan is even better -- just add ketchup or hot sauce.

Toilet paper - If it's somewhere in the bathroom, that's OK.

Cleaning - Huh?

Shoveling snow/raking leaves - Sooner or later it will melt/blow away.

Recycling - Similar to garbage -- just keep piling stuff up somewhere.

Remote controls - Like life support, men need to hold one at all times whether they use it or not.

Shopping - That's for women.

Gift giving - Something to do when women yell too many days in a row.

Vacations - When women want to leave home and need someone to carry their luggage.

Telephones - warning signs of company coming over.

Holidays - Being nice to people you hate.

Funerals - A somber gathering to talk to and about relatives you don't know.

Weddings - having to dress up and be nice to people you hate while talking to and about relatives you don't know.