Who’s Your Mommy?!

So now that J-Fed has someone living with him, it’s been quite an adjustment. I never expected it to happen so fast, but then whoever does? Anyway, now that she’s assumed my role, there are things I have to make peace with. For example, the kids are there with T.O.W. (The Other Woman). Although they are supposedly "just friends," it really doesn't matter when it comes to this part.

Initially, I was mortified by the thought of someone else tucking in my children. Imagine the thought of another woman cooking your daughter dinner, playing Pet Shops with her at night. That quality time that I could have been enjoying with her was being spent with T.O.W.

Just the other night J-Fed was on the phone with me going over something. Apparently, he had left his brain in the kitchen because he called out.

 “Girls, the cookies are ready,” the statement seemed innocent enough as he had always called daughter and I “the girls.” However, when he said “girls” this time, he was referring to T.O.W. and my daughter. It would be difficult for any woman to stomach, most certainly me. My children are my life. I’ve taken pride in raising them and forming a close bond with them. Now, I’ve become old news it appears.

 Why do I say this? Whenever J-Fed comes to pick up daughter, she glows with excitement. “Daddy, daddy. Is T.O.W. there? What time is T.O.W. going to be there? I can’t wait to see T.O.W.?” I can’t be angry with my daughter. She’s a 5-year-old child. She has no idea how it feels to watch your daughter clamor for the other woman. Part of me wants to grab J-Fed and T.O.W. by their throats and ask them exactly how they would feel if the shoe was on the other foot. What makes them think this okay?

But the realist in me knows that they don’t have a bone of empathy in their body to understand such a feeling.

 It’s nice that they want to play house together. Kudos to T.O.W. You see, when I lived with the Fedster, he spent most of his time in the garage, surfing eBay or listening to iTunes. Now, he’s the family guy, baking cookies with his girls, having dinner with his ready-made family. It’s all so cookie cutter and so convenient.

 I do my best to spend as much time with daughter so that a divide doesn’t come between us. Now, it’s like I have to compete with T.O.W. for the affection of my daughter. I know J-Fed and if there were some other man trying to play papa to his cubs, he’d go ballistic. What I haven’t yet seemed to grasp is why he thinks it’s okay to subject me to such rubbish.

 When daughter was begging for T.O.W. in front of me yesterday, J-Fed chided her and told her not to say those things in front of Mommy. Points for the fact that he at least remembers I am her mother. However, I almost felt the inclination to explain to him that he is the one facilitating this ordeal. Yet I kept my mouth shut. He didn’t care how I felt. He didn’t care what I said. I was a thing of the past. That was all fine and dandy, but as we all know, karma is a bitch. And what goes around will surely come around. That, I can promise.

So I hope J-Fed and T.O.W. enjoy the quality time they’re spending with my daughter. It better be worth it.