Who Let The Dogs Out?

With life as a single mom, there’s never a dull moment.

I used to complain that J-Fed never did anything. Maybe he did do things here and there. For me, it was never enough. However, now I know what it’s like to have less than zero help. It’s just me. Okay, well there is the nanny, and to be quite frank Mary Poppins is better than a husband any day of the week. Why? Because she works hard all day taking care of the kids while I work, and I don’t even have to reward her with sex in return. It doesn’t get any better than that.

Some nights though, it’s still not easy having a partner. Like last night, for example. Since J-Fed moved out I’ve done my darndest to ensure that daughters and I still eat as a family. Being that I work all day – and sometimes all night – this isn’t always a simple feat, especially when the unexpected happens.

I had just unwrapped a teriyaki pork roast that smelled like a dream. As I set it on the pan, I was licking my chops. It would go perfectly with au gratin potatoes and a freshly sliced tomato. I breathed a sigh of relief knowing that we would eat well. Just as I was about to stick the pork in the oven, my instant messenger flashed. A co-worker was asking me about some data he needed. I take pride in being diligent so I put dinner on hold and went to work on it immediately.

I figured it wouldn’t take that long, but five minutes quickly turned into ten minutes and then fifteen. I had completely forgotten about the oven pre-heating and the water I left boiling on the stove… until I heard the scream.

“Oh nooooooooooo,” It was Mary Poppins, shouting from the kitchen. I knew it wasn’t too serious because it sounded like she was about to die of laughter. And as I scrambled into the kitchen, I realized why. My beautiful pork roast was ass up on the floor. Hovering over it was little “cancer” man, his tongue still hanging out of his mouth. Immediately, his eyes widened and his ears assumed the guilty position. The dog had pulled my freakin roast of the counter.