Why Lie?

Almost everything my husband and I fight about could have been easily avoided if he had just been honest from the start. Slowly but surely I have found out that I was completely lied to about his opinions and thoughts. If I had known this was how he really felt about certain things I wouldn’t have EVER married him.

See for the most part I am a VERY laid back person. It takes a lot to get me angry or upset. I just figure if it’s not important then who cares? However, there are things that I do consider important and things I do care about. I always said I could never be with someone who had a problem with these things. He knows I feel this way.

When we were dating we talked about it, and he said felt the same. Now that we are married though all that has become the total opposite. I find it hard to believe that he lied to me and just agreed with me for 6 years. But I think that is exactly what he did, and now he figures we are married and I have to stay like it or not so he is finally being honest.

Here are the problems:

I am totally against discrimination. I think all people are equal. All genders, races, homosexuals, etc. I have always found it silly to dislike people based on these things, and knew I needed a partner that felt the same. Which he said he did. Now I know it was all a lie. Over the last month he has expressed his true feelings. Saying the church across the street from our house is stupid because they have a women pastor. He has made many horrible comments about African-Americans, and just yesterday said all homosexuals should be killed. WTF?!? I couldn’t believe this was coming from his mouth. 

I LOVE to travel. It’s my favorite thing in the world to do. I go away every summer for a month or two. Before we were married I told him that I will continue to go away every year. He is of course welcome to come with me, but whether he does or not I am going. Again he said he was fine with this. Now I have started to talk about where I would like to go next year, and he says I can’t go because it’s a waste of money. Whatever loser- you can’t stop me. And don’t ask me to choose between giving you up or giving traveling up because you really don’t want to hear the answer.